Yes My hands are full..... kind of

If I hear that phrase one more time I may scream. No matter where I go, if I have the twins with me, I will without a doubt hear that phrase.

"Boy do you have your hands full!"

Most of the time it is said in a sweet and mostly joking tone but every so often it's said with distain. Once when the twins were very tiny babies, a woman stopped me in Target. She looked at my prefect sleeping babes and asked if they were twins. Glowingly, I said yes. She then proceeded to tell me that if she was ever told that she was having twins, she'd kill herself. I stood there is absolute shock as she went on her merry way. I still think about that woman and how sad it was that she couldn't find the beauty or God's miracle in my sweet babies. These days they've been adding a new element to the "hands full" comment. D is at least three inches taller than sweet little L and a good three pounds heavier. It's been this way since birth. D has just recently started to have that little girl look while L  still has a sweet little baby face. All too often, people think they must be siblings and not twins. Now I get "Boy do you have your hands full, how close in age ARE they" as if it's some unspoken sin to have your children close together. I always tell them 57 seconds and then I walk away. They'll figure it out.

 

This judgment from others, this "you have too many babies" glare has really started to bug me now that my babies are edging closer to their second birthday. This is a magical time; this is thinking about the next baby time! I can't help but wonder what would be going on right now if I had had a singleton instead of twins. Now don't get me wrong, I adore my babies! I could never ask to be more blessed than being the mommy of my amazing babies. But, yes but! This is that magical time when we would be thinking about having another bundle of joy. I can't help but feel a small sense of loss. I want to be pregnant again. I want another baby but I don't feel that I have the right to want that. I have my three kids, all I need now is a dog and a picket fence and life should be perfect. Right? So why do I feel these pangs, this desire? A better question would be - why do I feel that we can't have more children? Are three children really too many? I need to take some time to sort out those answers, I need to wait for His answers and His time.

In the mean time (and yes time is mean right now!) while I wait patiently for the desire to go away or consume me, I'm trying to occupy my time. This weekend I felt very crafty. Ok EXTREMELY crafty. I made myself and my sister magnificent slings for my clingy babies and her soon-to-be newborn baby girl. I had enough leftover fabric to make D a lovely little skirt. When that craft was not enough, I made D four pairs of leg warmers in hope of cooler weather. Check out these fabulous goodies:

 

And if you are wondering, yes that is a baby deer made out of pipe cleaners. I crafted him and his little family this week, too.